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Saturday, April 21, 2012

The Pressure Is On--7:06 pm--4/17/2012

Hey Readers,

I am stressed out! Graduation is fast approaching and it seems like I have loads of work...well it doesn't seem like, I actually do. I don't know if I have told ya'll before but I have been taken dual enrolled classes since my junior year in high school, which means I will start college in the fall with eighteen credit hours. I've worked my ass off in high school so I will have a really easy first year. Sure it all sounds great, but actually getting there is the hard part. Now the work is easy, it's just the workload versus my schedule. My class gets out of school on May 4th. I graduate on May 8th. Now I have no high school classes, I just act as a Teacher’s Aid/ Peer Tutor. However, I am still enrolled in two college courses: my second freshman English and American History, which means I have to go by the college's schedule instead of my high school schedule. For some reason my professors seemed to have the bright idea of posting all the work we haven't had a chance to cover this year. In English, I have five assignments, two of which are long (6-8 page) research papers and one of those is going to be on a book that I have to search for a buy from somewhere. Must I remind you that Mansfield has no bookstores and Wal-Mart certainly doesn't have the book I need. The only thing that Pelican has is a corner gas station. I don't know anything about Many or Pleasant Hill or Zwolle because I don't have a reason to go that way. On top of all of that, I have three chapter of history to do plus quizzes on each of those chapters, then I have Exam 3 which is on all of the chapters in that unit, and then I have my final exam over all the chapters we have covered this year. Now all that has to be done by May 4th, which is no problem for me because I actually like this history class. I have fifteen days left of school to finish all the work on my online courses. You do remember me telling you that I don't have internet at home or my own computer? I just needed to vent for a minute while I stare depressingly at the stack of printouts that I have to carry home everyday just so I can stay ahead.

I know I'm complaining, but I can do that now that I am finally getting some things done around here. Thank God I just finished my APA research paper. Now I just need to get my hands on a copy of The Metamorphosis by Franz Kafka so I can do my other research paper, which I am so glad is in MLA format...yes! I only have two more chapters of history to go and I will be finish. I may have loose thoughts, but I do have time management skills when I need them. My only issue is finding a way to complete my English exam on May 7th, which is the day before graduation, which also means I will be out of school with no internet access. Well folks looks like I'm going to have to go to school one extra day.

Anywhoo, all this ish above will fall into play in due time. I'm not worried about it, but I am really stressed out, because I am now realizing my possible college workload. It was a huge "WELCOME TO COLLEGE," reality check for me. I know you guys don't know this but, this was supposed to be my break from writing. I actually finished up to chapter 10 and stopped (on purpose, not because I was stuck). A while ago my mama had gotten me a book by Kiki Swanson and some other girl who I know, but I can't remember how to spell it right now. Her first name begins with a D and her last name is Diamond. Anywhoo, to me, reading someone else's work is like eating someone else’s cooking. I love cooking and baking, but now my mother loves it so much that I am the main cook in the family so I love it when I get to eat my mother's or my sister's cooking. Well, that's what reading does for me. I can sit back and relax and enjoy someone else's work for a change. Well, so much for that dream. I can't read that book, because I am doing extra school work and get this I actually started writing the first page of chapter 11. I never thought I'd see the day when doing more writing is my break and it actually feels great. I just hate having my story in my head and not having the time to actually write it down. I daydream a lot so, I don't really forget what I'm going to write next, I just keep "re-living" it until I get it out and then I can move on to the next part. As a matter of fact, since I worked so hard and finished my APA paper, I think I'm going to treat myself and work on chapter 11 for the rest of the night (after I finish this entry of course).

So Saturday, I experienced being a bridesmaid for the first time in my life. The girl I referred to in my last blog that was so close to me that I don't consider her a friend anymore, she's my sister. Well she went all the way on April 14, 2012 at about 3:30 pm. Don't worry, she is not in her teens, I hang out with older people. Anywhoo, it was just me, her, her husband, and his best man up there. I was so honored to be the only one standing behind her, but that's another story. I never thought I'd be in a wedding at this young, but it opened my eyes up even more about life and not only how fast my friends and I are growing up, but how fast our generation is growing up (or wanting to grow up as the adults like to say). I don't think it's us, I think it's the time and the atmosphere that my friends and I are growing up in. For example, (and I'm talking to strictly the ones who have read my book) I have a wild imagination with my plots and characters, but a lot of the stuff in my books are based of true instances and 80%-90% of my characters are based off of the people that I know. So, my advice to the adults out there, don't blame the children for the way they act or for "growing up too fast," blame the times we live in and blame the people you let them around. They didn't get it on their own, but it had to come from somewhere...think about it.

Until next time readers...

Queen B.

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